Surviving Unforeseen Change
“There is nothing so stable as change” - Bob Dylan
Change can be hard, whether or not you’re anticipating it, you initiated it, or it happened unexpectedly.
A lay-off from a job, the death of a loved one, the ending of a romantic or platonic relationship, a natural disaster, a health or family emergency; these are things that we know are a part of life, but are unpredictable.
“Weak…
Dizzy…
Disbelief…
Shock…
What is happening?
I don’t understand what is happening…”
Unexpected change can be disorienting, and can contribute to significant emotional distress.
Have you ever been in your stride, making progress with a personal or professional goal and then something happens that you just couldn’t see coming?
It could’ve been during the middle of a semester at school.
You might have just received a promotion and was becoming acclimated to new responsibilities.
Or, something you were anticipating and were very sure about now is no longer a possibility.
“This feels violent.
This feels unfair.
I feel alone.
No one understands.
Anger…
Frustration…
Despair…
Sadness…
What now?
What’s next?”
In times like these, things are going one way, and then suddenly nothing makes sense anymore, possibly dealing a blow to your confidence.
Any of the emotions that come up in response to this imposed crisis are normal.
Allowing ourselves the space to feel all of the emotions that arise when we are faced with a situation that is outside of our control is so important.
Don’t try to deny what you’re feeling.
Don’t avoid it with distraction for too long.
The sooner we can acknowledge our feelings and offer ourselves compassion, the sooner we can use the information that our emotions relay to us to move through the experience.
We need to rely on our inner strength to navigate times like these.
What does self-care look like in times like right now? Consider both your mental health, and your physical health.
We can also improve our resiliency by looking to methods that bolster mental grit, such as the use of mantras or prayer.
This is a great time to look to your social supports, such as family, friends, a romantic partner, or your therapist.
Some people do incredibly well when it comes to change.
For others, change can be challenging.
Sometimes, no matter our threshold, the change itself can be difficult to manage.
Unfortunately, none of us can avoid the type of change that can cause us to lose our balance for even a short period of time, in this life.
If this resonates with you right now, remember, this is just a chapter and not your entire story.
I hope this helps.
As Always, Be Well!
~Jessica Herd, LMHC
Resources:
National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Dial “988”
Text Crisis Line: Text “HELLO” to 741741
