Love, in Your Language

“True love always liberates.” -Dr. Gary Chapman

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Dr. Gary Chapman shares his theory about romantic relationships in his book, “The 5 Love Languages”. He believes that there are five emotional love languages in which individuals speak and understand emotional love. He explained that we each have a primary love language (I list them below).

I often refer to this book when issues in romantic partnerships are a major source of distress and a focus in therapy. Many people have found adapting this theory into their relationships, and not just romantic ones, to be very helpful.

Words of Affirmation

Verbal compliments

Encouraging words

Communicating kindly

Statements of appreciation

Respectful expressions and requests

Physical Touch

Holding hands

Embracing

Kissing

Shoulder rub or squeeze

Massage

Sex

Quality Time

Focused, undivided attention

Uninterrupted, intentional time

Quality conversation

Meaningful activities

Dates

Acts of Service

Serving

Helping

Anticipating needs

Gifts

Tangible reminders (non-monetary or monetary)

Visual symbols

Financial investments

Thoughtful tokens purchased, found, or made


Do you see a love language that stands out to you? I believe that we can have a top 2, or 3. I also believe that we can appreciate being shown love via all of the love languages.

You can discover your own love language by taking the online quiz.

I’d love to know what your love language is! Visit @JHMentalHealth, leave a comment on this post using a “heart” ❤️ emoji, and share your love language!

Philautia

Something that I’ve stumbled across online recently that I love is the remix on the five love languages- applying your primary love language to yourself.

Philautia - The Greek word for Self-Love

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, how about a challenge? Show yourself some love!
Ideas for practicing Philautia in each love language:

Words of Affirmation:

Write yourself a love letter.

Quality Time:

Watch your favorite movie. [Put your phone on DND]

Gifts:

Buy yourself some flowers, or chocolates.

Physical Touch:

Schedule a massage.

Acts of Service:

Make yourself (or order in) Valentine’s Day brunch or dinner.

Do you plan to try one of the suggestions? I’d love to know how you celebrated loving yourself! Visit @JHMentalHealth, leave a comment on this post using a “rose”🌹 emoji, and let me know how you did!

February is Black History Month!

Have you tried Liberate yet? It’s a meditation app with BIPOC peoples in mind.

Here are some suggestions for Self-Empowerment and Self-Love Meditations from Black Spiritual and Wellness Guides on Insight Timer:

Nadine Russell - Self-Love Affirmations

Koya Webb - Remember Who You Truly Are

Lalah Delia - Inner Gardening Care

Lalah Delia - Taking Your Power Back

Alexandra Love - I Am Abundant

As always, be well!

~Jessica


Spring, Is That You?

Morning Self-Care: Day 10

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